the origin story of ladyfinger’s

“A Ladyfinger is a dry, egg based sugar biscuit, roughly shaped like a lady’s middle finger.”

the LADY behind the FINGER

In one form or another the superhero origin story has been around for millennia: A heroine battles supernatural forces and returns from this mysterious adventure with the dynamism to bestow boons on her fellow womankind. Superhero origin stories show us not how to obtain superpowers but how to become super humans. (Wearing a wig, thigh-highs or bra is optional.)

Like any superhero origin story our Elizabethan heroine, Miss. Ladyfinger, endured life-altering experiences, causing her transformation. The typical forces that we can all relate to: destiny, chance, trauma and epic amounts of nonsensical drama. Her story is filled with chaos, heartbreak and disappointment; the slow simmering ingredients that create a strong lady and fill one’s being with outrage. Suddenly she came to her senses and the courage of her female race awoke. She stood unabashedly naked, clenched her hand and raised one sincere finger. In that defining moment she cast down all the lies thrown at her with the fierceness of an Amazonian warrior and remembered with the stoicism of Marie Antoinette who she is; endowing her with a fearless middle finger and the superhuman capacity for empathy, one of the greatest superpowers of all.

Here at Ladyfinger’s, we empathize with every woman who has ever been lied to, intimidated, isolated, humiliated, punished, dehumanized, objectified, victimized, terrorized, traumatized, betrayed, degraded, devalued, discarded, triangulated, denigrated, manipulated, controlled, shamed, wrongfully blamed, slandered, gaslighted, mind twisted, cheated on, used, accused, emotionally abused, mocked and criminally stalked; all by the very same person saying “I love you.”

Every superhero has an arch-nemesis. Miss. Ladyfinger’s is the NARCISSIST: Evil villains who lust for attention, power and control. Frauds, who hide behind a mask of superiority and entitlement. Manipulative users, who view others not as human beings, but rather as tools or means to an end. Hypocrites, who have no compunction about harming innocent people to protect their false persona. These are the real life predatory parasites (disguised as human beings) that Miss. Ladyfinger abhors. It’s unladylike to call names, but when it comes to narcissists, calling them out is really a matter of survival for those dealing with their astonishingly vicious abuse.

Like any good story, the sagas of superheroes bring us out of ourselves and connect us with something larger than ourselves, something more universal. At Ladyfinger’s womankind band together as a community. Here beauty is an expression of a woman’s freedom to be her most authentic and incredible self. At Ladyfinger’s we celebrate everything it means to be a ladylike, feminine and female. A place where women celebrate women. A place where fierce, fragile and fashionable females fancifully muse over the art of afternoon tea. A place where women can literally and figuratively ‘spill the tea’. No inhibition. No judgement. Just compassion and love.

At Ladyfinger’s the genuine care and comfort of our guests is our highest mission. The tea room, born out of love, not only serves up savouries and sweet treats, but also awe-inspiring beauTEA, positiviTEA, hospitaliTEA and femininiTEA with a side dish of nudiTEA (fine artworks tastefully displayed on the walls that is).

It’s not who you are underneath, it’s what you do that defines you. And as such, one of the defining features of a superhero is an over-riding mission to serve the larger world and to defend it by fighting for truth, justice and the American way. Which is why Miss. Ladyfinger (actually the real identity of our heroine) advocates for victimized women in the community by being a partner/financial supporter of the Woman’s Crisis Center; Whose mission is to end the cycle of abuse.

In closing Miss. Ladyfinger would like to thank her middle finger for sticking up for her and to offer a friendly reminder that self-love is the greatest middle finger of all time.

And so you ask: Who is the secret identity of Miss. Ladyfinger?!

The world may never know…